Life Imitates Music and Vice Versa

This afternoon I went for my usual walk. While walking, I found myself mentally drifting to a better place, a place completely opposite of the life that I live now. A place where Veronica and I can be ourselves and not have to deal with the control, ignorance, meaness and lunacy that seems to have fused itself into every fiber of our lives. I have learned that some people can't be happy and actually don't want anyone else to be happy. They are at their best when playing the victim. They want everyone to feel sorry for them and they want every one to be as unhappy and miserable as they are...as they have always been....as they have always wanted you to be. This is the type of person that deliberately finds a way to to turn anything good into something bad. The type of person who seems to deliberately try to ruin every relationship that they have ever had with anyone and then feel sorry for themselves because no one wants to bother with them. It seems to be a life cycle that does nothing but go in circles with nothing good or productive coming out of it. When you are subjected to this type of behavior for so long, you fear that you will become this person. It is almost like a brainwashing...day in and day out..the same behavior continues. What you see and what you are subjected to becomes your normal. You try to fight against it as hard as you can because you know that there is a better life out there and that this is not "normal" in the outside world, but it is your normal within the confines of these 4 walls. Sometimes you feel like you are drowning in this vast sea of lunacy but you hang onto your life ring as hard as you can...doing everything in your power to keep your head above water so as not to drown in the craziness of it all. You do not want to become a mirror image of this type of person and it becomes a daily battle to keep your spirit and soul intact and to not fall into the clone trap. And here I was, walking and day dreaming of a better time and of a better place that is somewhere out there. A place waiting for Veronica and I to arrive. And the whole while that I was thinking these thoughts, music was playing in the background. It was a song by Billy Joel....River Of Dreams. I replayed the song several times while walking and I was amazed at how the lyrics of this song fit where I was in my life and our current environment. I know that things will change for us and it will be in a good way, but until those changes arrive, I will continue to be "carried along by the river of dreams".

In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
From the mountains of faith
To the river so deep
I must be lookin' for something
Something sacred I lost
But the river is wide
And it's too hard to cross
even though I know the river is wide
I walk down every evening and stand on the shore
I try to cross to the opposite side
So I can finally find what I've been looking for
In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the valley of fear
To a river so deep
I've been searching for something
Taken out of my soul
Something I'd never lose
Something somebody stole
I don't know why I go walking at night
But now I'm tired and I don't want to walk anymore
I hope it doesn't take the rest of my life
Until I find what it is I've been looking for
In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the jungle of doubt
To the river so deepI know
I'm searching for something
Something so undefined
That it can only be seen
By the eyes of the blind
In the middle of the night (break)
I’m not sure about a life after this
God knows I've never been a spiritual man
Baptized by the fire, I wade into the river
That is runnin' through the promised land
In the middle of the night
I go walking in my sleep
Through the desert of truth
To the river so deep
We all end in the ocean
We all start in the streams
We're all carried along
By the river of dreams
In the middle of the night

2 Once In A Lifetime Moments All In The Same Day

Today there were supposedly 2 once in a lifetime moments and both had to do with numbers in sequential order. Roughly four seconds before 12:35, the digital date was 12:34:56 on today's date of 07/08/09. Then this afternoon at 4:56 the numbers are sequential again at 4:56 on today's date of 07/08/09. But were both of these occurrences actually once in a lifetime moments? Well they weren't if you were born before 1:23AM on April 5th of 2006, which would make the sequence 1:23 on 04/05/06. These particular numerical events only occur in countries where the month comes first when writing the date out...like today is 07/08/09. Countries such as Britain put the day before the month, which would make today 08/07/09. I am sure that somewhere in time, Britain has had their share of numerical once in a lifetime moments. Were you aware when these sequentially numbered events occurred today? Did you stop and take a moment to acknowledge the event? Like most of us, these one minute events passed me by while I was busy doing other things. But isn't that the way it usually is? Each of us have once in a lifetime moments on a daily basis. They might be something very small or trivial or something very grand but no matter how big or small, unfortunately most of these special events pass us by without us even realizing that they have occurred. Or maybe by the time you realize it, it is too late to relish and treasure the moment. Maybe it really is time for each of us to slow down just a bit and as that old saying goes....take a moment to smell the roses.

Traveling Plans

Veronica has been going through a complete store remodel, so her days have been extremely long and her nights extremely short. The job will be done in about 3 1/2 weeks. A couple of weeks after the job is done, we will go up to Canada for a week of relaxation and fishing. Veronica will really need that vacation break after all of the hours that she has put into the remodel. She has one week of vacation left after we go up to Canada. We have been tossing around ideas of things to do that would not cost an arm and a leg. We decided to go to the Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg TN area. We had rented a cabin in the area before and had a real nice time. That was back in 2007. We decided that we would ask my parents if they wanted to go. There were a lot of things to consider before we asked them. My Dad is on dialysis so he would have to set up his treatments for our time there and then there is my Mother who likes to do nothing but shop. There is a lot of shopping areas in Pigeon Forge/Gatlinburg but we did not want to drive that whole way just so she could spend every ones time shopping. They are both getting on in age and this would most likely be the last opportunity for us to go anywhere with them. It has also become very evident that if we did not invite them, then they would not be going anywhere on their own. There were a lot of things to consider before we came to our final decision. After coming to the decision of inviting them, I went searching a for a cabin to rent. We would much rather rent a cabin with mountain views than get a hotel room in the city itself and having views of the traffic. I found us a nice 2 bedroom cabin that is far enough away from the busy tourist areas but close enough to get every where we want or need to go. My Dad has set up his dialysis to be done on the Saturday before we leave and then on Tuesday, Thursday and on the Saturday right before we head back home. We have also explained to my Mother that she would have a certain amount of time for her shopping. If we did not limit her, we would end up shopping everyday there and all day long....not our idea of a vacation at all. We will be going the last week in September, beginning of October. It should be interesting to see how this vacation goes, especially with our relationship as far as my Mother is concerned. Hopefully by the time we return, Veronica and I might have something really exciting to look forwards to....like a move.