If this Has Happened To Anyone Else..Please Raise Your Hands

I wanted to share a situation with you. This is one of those things that really get the ole "roids" all fired up. Here is the scenario....you have lots of assorted items on your daily "to do" list. But you have to hold off on doing them because you need to contact a life insurance, which I will call Company X. Company X sent me a check for $8.00 and there was no note or letter attached or in the envelope...just the lone check. Now I have learned my lesson from past experiences...there is no such thing as free money and by cashing this check, I could be agreeing who knows what, possibly raising my life insurance policy to 2.5 million dollars. Of course along with the raise in the policy there also comes a huge raise in the premium, which I can't afford. So being the honorable and concerned customer that I am, I proceed to call the phone number to Company X that is listed on my last premium notice. After dialing the number, I get this boring mechanical simulated human voice telling me that if I want so & so, please press on the phone or say the number 1 or if I want another so & so, then I need to press press on the phone or say number 2. This continues through 7 different sections within Company X. Now since the free check that I received did not fit into any of the numbered categories that the boring mechanical simulated human voice requested that I press or say, I am left to my own devices and I need to make an educated guess. So I decide that #3 seems to fit the closest to what my problem was. So I say #3. After saying this number, I am then transferred into...now here comes the scary movie sounds...DA DA DA DA..."THE QUE". Now that I am in...DA DA DA DA..."THE QUE", someone is trying to keep me awake by playing some type of lounge lizard music. The music is like hypnosis to me and I start to nod off. Every minute or so, I get awoke by another boring mechanical simulated human voice telling me how important my call is, that all of their people are busy with other complainers...I mean customers and that the next available person will be with me shortly. Then the music starts again and I start to nod off once again. This sequence occurs for at least 10 minutes. At this point in time, I put my phone on the speaker phone function because I am getting a kink in my nexk. It is around this time I hear a different voice, a voice of someone that was doing their best to speak the English language but it wasn't working out so well. This person stated their name and asked me if they could help me. Because I was almost completely asleep, I almost missed talking to this person but collected my foggy thoughts just in time and I began explain about the free check I received and what the check was for. Unfortunately I had to repeat myself 3 times because we just could not connect on the same frequency. After my last attempt at communication, this person said that she would have to transfer me to another department. During this transferal process, I can hear a phone ringing like i had just dialed a number. Once the sound of the dialing stopped, I was once again placed in...DA DA DA DA...another QUE. Rewind and play lounge lizard sleepy time music...boring mechanical simulated human voice again..OK you know how this goes..no need for me to tire out my typing finger repeating the process. Then out of the blue a persons voice jumped on the line and stated their name, in their best English and asked me if they could help me. I said "yes please help me...I NEED HELP!!!!" and I started to explain about the free check that I received in the mail. I was starting to feel really good that I finally reached the proper destination and that help was on its way. I was almost through my spiel when all of a sudden....silence.....disconnected...NOOOOOooooooooo!!!!!!...input hair pulling and cussing at this point in time. Another 1/2 hour wasted out of my life.
Now let's be honest here...if this has happened to you, please raise your hands and let me get a count. Ok..There is 1..got you at 2...I see you over there 3...c'mon raise it like you mean it, ok 4.......

27 comments:

.beee. said...

Seriously, this happens WAY too often in our day to day lives. Yeesh....

j marie said...

My favorite is the "disconnect". I always get this when we are headed in the correct direction. Then I have to call back and start all over again and again and again....

SCREAMING FOR CHOCOLATE said...

Yes...Happened to me today when I tried to cancel my cell phone service....because it keeps dropping calls...the call dropped. Not quite the same but frustrating to say the least. I have actually been on the phone with customer service for 2 hours before.

LOVE your music. I am a big Al Green fan...

Coco

Kathy said...

*Raises my hand* lol happens all the time it absolutely drives me crazy. I read somewhere that some of the companies have a 'patience' meter kind of thing and if you're sounding really upset they connect you faster. I've never been lucky enough to call one of those, but I've heard of them. :) Thanks for the great story!

Ann said...

I don't consider myself old, having just pass half a century. I just hate it when I ring some institution to get that reply:

If you need **** press 1
If you need **** press 2 and so on,
If you know the ext number , press ***

But the 3rd or 4th,*** I am loss.

kanmuri said...

This has happened to me before two, and on both sides, the customer and the customer service agent.

rainey said...

YES, my hand is raised. By the time I get the correct person, I'm ready to scream.

RileyScott said...

Happened to me while ordering shirts this past Christmas. Took me 2 hours to order 6 shirts....oye

Katie S said...

The worst is when the automated voice asks you to say actual words, forcing you to practice your best articulation. Terrible. "Please say the Apple product you are calling about." --> "i-Phone". --> "I think you said I-POD. (no! no no!) Alright, I'll transfer your call. Please hold on." The iPod guy answers, asks what's wrong with your iPod...this must be the most frustrating technology for people with heavy accents.

Tanna said...

I laughed 'til I cried! Can you say AMEN! Both hands are up!

Bdogs said...

That happened to me last month trying to get help for an issue at Dell. When I called back (yes, I did) I was so irate that they passed me to a miracle worker. She blinked and all the problems went away, just like that. I had operative contact numbers and several calls back to be sure everything was OK, etc. So some of the twits are learning...

Barbra joan said...

yes, Rick it has happened to all of us , its just that your way of telling it was very amusing.
Art Heart

Audrie99 said...

Hi Rick,

It happens to all of us and it is the most annoying thing! I have to tell you though I got some of the best advice from someone at one of those places on what to do. He told me that once the recordings start just hit "0". If it asks you to go back, hit "0" again, it will connect you to someone automatically! The same is true at doctors offices as well. Hope this may help :)

I must say, your music is awesome as well. Everytime I read a post, I am always singing along :)

Ask Malii said...

I laughed myself silly when you mentioned that you put it on the speaker; nowadays, if I have to wait more than three minutes, the call automatically gets the "speaker" mode. During that time, I try to do other businesses like eating or reading. Just acknowledging that so many people experience it is depressing. Ugh...

iVaz said...

You state, a person trying their best to speak English, that's way to common IMO, (not being racist or anything here) but damn IMO, most Indians rule the phone's now...

nishgurl said...

yes I have been here too many times to count lol. I went as far to make sure with a certain phone company that they gave me a phone number direct to a manager to help me because i was having so many problems with thier company. Also a trick i learned is either press 0 or start pressing all the buttons in a crazy motion, this causes you to be taken out of the cue and suddenly an operater appears yay. Its worked more than once for me. lets all try it and piss off the companys8D

GirlLover said...

I thought your post was great, funny, and well-written.

Yes, it has happened to me, too. My hand is raised.

JovanaCuba said...

haha funny =]

OWW/Claire said...

and don't you just love when you get the call and it's some recording...in our office we get Tugboat John (our nickname for him)

If you don't stay on the line...TJ will call you right back. Who are these people...do they not realize that they're only annoying you? I mean, who on a Monday morning wants some recorded sales pitch starting their day...any of you get the tugboat guy????

Have a great day...
OWW/Claire

The Machinist's Wife said...

Spot on, Rick. It seems that this happens to a lot of us, all around the world. It happened to me recently regarding email technical help. Exactly as you have written. And you have written it well....

Beautiful Mess said...

I do wish "to speak to someone who speaks English press 4" was an option. Unfortunately this has happened to me too mcuh!

cyn richardson said...

I see someone already mentioned the press "0" until you get a person--this does work often, but sometimes it's "an invalid entry, please try again" LOL--For the $8 check I'assume you have torn up by now, at least you got some entertainment and sympathy!

Haunting Images said...

I just got off the phone with company X just a couple minutes ago! I almost died laughing reading this post, especially when you mentioned the lounge music, lmao! Do you know there's even a service that will call those stupid numbers, get the right idiot on the line, and then ring you back so you can resolve your issue.....now whether they speak english, or are even in this country I don't know.

Cissy Apple said...

Hi Rick,

Thanks for visiting my site! I happened across your blog and liked what you were doing.

I was once placing a service call to have AT&T, Verizon, or some-such check on a customer's phone line. I was on the phone forever. They kept transferring me, each one telling me I wasn't talking to the correct department, region...whatever. After over an hour on the phone, I ended up getting re-connected to the original person I called!

Out of frustration one day, I just started hitting numbers on the receiver. That got me a person. Since then I've learned that many phone systems are set up so if you hit 00, you'll get a person.

And a really neat website that just recently helped me out with AT&T Wireless is www.gethuman.com. It's a listing of companies and the neat little tricks that will get you connected to a real person instead of some recorded voice of options, none of which fit the situation you are calling about.

~Cissy

Chelsey said...

HaHa. Funny I should come across this today. I just had that happen to me yesterday. I spent an hour and a half on the phone wasting away. I even got the disconnect after the first 40 minutes of waiting. But hey, thanks for the laugh! :-D

Life Paints its Own Canvas said...

*rasing hand really high* This is what they do to discourage us from calling back ~ hence less service they have to provide. The Customer Service bar has been lowered so much these days that I'm not even sure we should be calling departments customer service anymore!

PawsN2Stamp said...

Oh my gosh...TOOOO FUNNY....but alas....TOO REAL, too!

I have been there many, many times, myself!

At least we CAN joke about it!! :-)

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