The Surrender

Feet running
hitting concrete
moving swiftly
trying to escape
like a stampeding herd of wild horses
pulse pounding
muscles throbbing
heart aching
then silence
giving in and giving up
weary and drained
no desire to continue
loss of will
no strength to keep going
or to keep fighting
the protective wall that I put up slowly crumbles
the cloud of dust and particles remain heavy in the air
I am now totally yours
as you always wanted
to use and abuse
to be taken advantage of
and to be taken for granted
my soul plodded and plundered
to be manipulated and molded
another you
and when finished with
cast aside and discarded
without a second glance or thought
lowly remains of a life lost and wasted
remembered only as what you created
within you own mind
not what or who I truly was
but what you made me to be
ONLY because I surrendered

Flowers Of The Day

Just a few more photos of new flower growth in the gardens. I don't remember what they are called, but the first thing that comes to my mind when I look at them, would be Tinkerbells. I had 2 readers tell me that they were hyacinths...grape hyacinths - Armeniacum Muscari to be precise. Thanks to both California Girl and Deerfriend for the help on the type of flowers these are.

Welcome Back All

The mystery of the missing subscribers has been solved. As of this morning, all of my subscribers via Google Feed are back. There must have been a glitch on Googles side of things. I apologize for not writing quite as much as I normally do....possibly writers block. But I do have a couple of things in the works..at least mentally. Just a matter of putting finger to keyboard. And speaking of finger, I mainly use one finger to type with. Sounds strange but that is the way I have always typed. I use my left middle finger to type with. I wonder if there is some type of correlation between using my middle finger to type with and some sort of built up anger or issues that I am holding inside...hmmmm....might be time to visit a professional. What I do know for sure is that the same middle finger has been hurting for about a month now. I do use it a lot. The answer is "no" I haven't been flipping a lot of people off, but thank you for asking...lol. Actually I went to the doctor because of the pain. The tendon in the finger tightens up and makes it hard to move the finger plus my knuckle hurts a lot. It is the knuckle closest to my hand. I can actually feel the bones in that knuckle click as they are rubbing against each other, when I bend my finger open and close. It gets so painful that it wakes me up at night. That is what happened last night. The pain woke me up and I had to go into the bathroom and run hot water over my finger to get it to loosen up. Then I rubbed some cream in it. The doctor said I had "trigger finger". He has given me some anti inflammatory pills to take. If those don't work the next step is some injections in my finger. The worst part is that I would have to change which finger that I would be typing with. It took me years to become an efficient typer with this middle finger. The last thing I want to do is have to learn how to type using a different one. Not much else I can do though. Kind of like a bird with a broken wing.