Saturday, September 4, 2010

Years Ago...Back In The Day

Years ago...back in the day...it was so easy to get ready for a trip.
Throw a few things in the old suitcase...grab a few essentials to ward off the progress of bad breath or general body funk.
Things sure were a hell of a lot easier back then.
Nowadays I pack my usual favorite clothing items and of course I still bring my essentials but the thing that takes the most time getting together is the voluminous amounts of pills, vitamins, supplements, creams and other assorted goodies.
Besides the pills that are in my official pharmacy bottles, I have one of those blue 2 week pill containers that have the plastic tops that you can pop open and 14 cubicles to put you favorite assortment of pills in and let me tell you, by the time I get done, those little cubicles are packed to the rafters.
Here are just a few that get packed up:
Pills to keep my blood pressure at a reasonable level
Vitamin pills....both general and individual ones that cover just about every letter in the alphabet
Calcium pills...gotta keep my bones happy while we are out and about
Pink chewables along with various antacid pills
Childrens strength aspirin to keep everything unclogged
Numerous types of pills for assorted types of pain
A once a week pill to give me the proper bone density...this pill is good friends with Mr. Vitamin D and Mr. Calcium
A pill to keep Mr. Bladder happy
Several pills so that Mr. Prostate is healthy and happy. I used to be good friends with Mr. Prostate. We always hung out together but not so much any more. You see...Mr. Prostate is in my dog house because he came down with a bad attitude and began acting like he was too big for his britches. And to top it off, he started to put the squeeze on Mr. Bladder and his sidekick...Uretha. And we couldn't have any of that.
Then there are pills to help me sleep
Then there are the pills that help keep the ole pipes flowing freely, in case they get backed up
And then the pills that slow things down in case the pipes flow too freely
In case those misbehaving pipes get all fired up, well we got some cream and suppositories to send those pipes back where they came from.
Then we got pills to git it up
Pills to git it down
Pills that make your head spin round and round
Then there are pills to help me have healthy joints
And of course there are the numerous pills that are supposed to vastly improve my cognitive skills.

Hmmmm!!!!

Where was I?

Say what?

Huh???!!!!
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